五月

A Boring, Tiring, Yet Beautiful Day
I woke up from a beautiful sleep, it's almost 8'o-clock when I woke up, too tired and lazy to get out of bed, I browse through my cellphone first to see the daily lives of my favorite artist in Instagram like Twice, BTS, etc. after 5 minutes I get out of bed, brush my teeth, wash my face, take a shower and cleaned the house. After cleaning our dirty house, I practice my playing my violin once again for 4 hours practicing the etudes that my teacher told me to practice and also the repertoire that I have been working on for the last 4 days yet still creates a shitty sound as if something is missing in the piece that I am playing.

I was suppose to play in the recital that is going to happen today at the Sandy Library @ 5 pm but I changed my mind due to lack of confidence in my music, I need more practice! practice! practice! before I can play in the recital. Furthermore, I also sang a little bit in the karaoke today just to relax a bit from practicing my violin for many hours and even though I am not playing in the recital and just going to listen to the other students play, for some reason I still feel a little bit nervous. Thoughts like "should I play in the recital?", "Is this playing or sound good enough?", "Should I just wait until I am all better at playing?" have been going on through my mind since last night.